The basic concept of divorce mediation is that it is a collaborative process where both partners work together to reach an agreement that works for both of them. The mediator facilitates the discussion and helps each individual understand their partner's perspective while still maintaining their own needs. There are some drawbacks to divorce mediation, however. The most significant drawback is that the mediator does not have the power to enforce any agreements that are made by the divorcing couple.
If you decide to go this route, you must be willing to stick with whatever terms you agree upon in order for the process to work. Temporary The most common use of mediation in divorce is to negotiate temporary arrangements for the children, pending a final settlement. This is because custody and parenting time disputes are considered impulsive and emotionally charged, so it is often easier to reach an agreement through mediation. Mediation, however, does have some drawbacks as well.
The mediator does not have the authority to enforce an agreement so you must be willing to stick to whatever terms you agree upon.Cannot push forthThe most important thing to remember about mediation is that it can't force you to do anything you don't want to do. A good mediator will try to help you agree on terms that are satisfactory but will not push you toward a conclusion that you don't want. When hiring a mediator, ask if they are comfortable with your goals in mediation and what their role will be in the process.
While they should be impartial, they may still give advice during negotiations or push one side or the other toward a conclusion they feel is best for everyone. Unrealistic expectations Another drawback is if one or both partners bring unrealistic expectations into the process. Mediation may not be able to solve every problem, especially if one spouse wants to relocate or wants sole custody of the children and the other spouse is unwilling to make such concessions. The mediator can only do so much when there are irreconcilable differences between the two parties.
Reluctance to accept realityIf you go into mediation with accepting the reality and manage your expectation, you will likely walk away disappointed. The drawback is that you may not be able to completely control what happens during the process, which means you might end up with an agreement that you don't like if your partner does not agree to all terms you want.Lack of authority The biggest drawback to mediation is that it does not involve a judge so there is no authority figure to enforce the terms of your agreement.
If one spouse decides not to follow the terms of your agreement, you are forced to seek legal action on your own if necessary. Divorce mediation is often used in an effort to resolve a divorce without going to trial. In fact, the divorce process can be significantly cheaper and quicker when using this method. Mediation is also a popular option for couples who just want to work out details of child custody and child support rather than a complete dissolution of the marriage.